When you finally learn to stop critiquing yourself, you’ll notice that you simultaneously stop critiquing other people too.
What a relief this is!
This is the non-duality of selfless compassion.
No one likes being judgemental of others, and yet… it just seem to spontaneously happen. However, this is merely a habitual by-product of the ego—a tendency that is dissolved once you become truly self-aware.
It needs to be realized that the more you think about your own self-identity, the more you will compare yourself to others. But, how your perceive others is always distorted by your very own self-image, so the whole mess becomes a self-perpetuating cycle of egoic disillusionment.
For example, if you judge yourself entirely by your own outward appearance, then this is the very same measuring stick you will define others by.
Your judgements of others are always your own self-reflection.
Whatever you believe about yourself is what you will believe about others. So if you treat yourself poorly, then you that you will treat others poorly too.
Observe yourself. When you think about other people where do your thoughts tend to drift? Do you see a recurring pattern in the nature of your opinions? What do you seem to focus on the most? What are you most critical of?
Your impression of someone will always be relative to whatever you think of yourself.
So… just stop thinking about yourself! Stop the entire process altogether. Get out of your head. The more you dwell on your own self-image and self-identity, the more self-involved and self-possessed you become.
Your falsely imagined self-concept distorts your entire world view—this is the greatest ignorance there is.
Love yourself—not whatever opinions you have of your personal characteristics, intelligence, traits, or behaviour—but love your true self, your very presence of beingness.
Realize that you are not your opinions, nor your thoughts. You are not wealth, nor your possessions. You are not your personality, nor your knowledge. You are the knowing presence that perceives them—which is no different than everyone else! We are all one and same.
Everything that your mind tempts you into believing about both yourself and others is illusory.
When you have abandoned your attachment to how things appear, starting with yourself, and you learn to truly love your self unconditionally, then the imagined barrier that stands between you and all others will dissolve at once.
Hold no opinions. Relax all subjectivity. See without comparison. Be without preference.
True compassion is free of personal opinion. It is selfless.